Sir Henry Raeburn’s The Skating Minister (1790)

Sev­er­al times, in a for­mer job role, I had occa­sion to trav­el by train to Edinburgh’s Waver­ley Sta­tion and from thence to our site in Liv­ingston, where I would do my thing, stay overnight, and make the return jour­ney home the next day. Although usu­al­ly the booked train tick­ets allowed lit­tle room for extracur­ric­u­lar activ­i­ties, there was one occa­sion on which I man­aged to engi­neer a cou­ple of spare hours to vis­it Edinburgh’s Nation­al Gallery. It’s a five-minute walk from Waver­ley Sta­tion, past the Wal­ter Scott mon­u­ment and along Princes Street Gar­dens, and it is well worth the effort.

One of the more unusu­al of its col­lec­tion is Hen­ry Raeburn’s The Skat­ing Min­is­ter. Paint­ed around 1790, it depicts the Rev­erend Robert Walk­er, min­is­ter at Edinburgh’s Canon­gate Kirk, skat­ing on Dud­dingston Loch. It was prac­ti­cal­ly unknown until 1949 (when it was acquired), but has since become some­thing of an icon of Scot­tish cul­ture, paint­ed as it was dur­ing the Scot­tish Enlight­en­ment. It is today rare for Dud­dingston Loch to be suf­fi­cient­ly frozen for skat­ing, but in the Lit­tle Ice Age that encom­passed the 18th cen­tu­ry, the loch was the favourite meet­ing place of the Edin­burgh Skat­ing Club, of whom Robert Walk­er was a promi­nent mem­ber.

Sir Hen­ry Rae­burn was Edinburgh’s own, too. Born in Stock­bridge, a for­mer vil­lage now part of Edin­burgh, he was respon­si­ble for some thou­sand por­traits of Scotland’s great and good. He was dis­in­clined to leave his native land and, as a result, his renown in Scot­land is not matched in Eng­land where the names of Joshua Reynolds and Thomas Gains­bor­ough dom­i­nate the por­trai­ture of the peri­od. But in the Scot­tish Nation­al Gallery, he is far from for­got­ten, and his Skat­ing Min­is­ter will remain a firm favourite there for years to come.

 

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow’s A Psalm Of Life (1838)

The poet Hen­ry Wadsworth Longfel­low (1807–1882) is prob­a­bly best known over here in the UK for his Song of Hiawatha (which I for one remem­ber doing at school), but also in his native US for his com­mem­o­ra­tive poem about that icon­ic event of the Amer­i­can Rev­o­lu­tion, Paul Revere’s Ride. He also com­posed the epic poem Evan­ge­line, about that shame­ful episode in British his­to­ry known as the Great Upheaval, or the Expul­sion of the Aca­di­ans, dur­ing the French and Indi­an War of 1754–1763. This was the forced depor­ta­tion by the British of thou­sands of the large­ly civil­ian pop­u­la­tions from the Cana­di­an Mar­itime provinces to oth­er colonies (includ­ing Span­ish Louisiana where the Aca­di­ans would become “Cajuns”, but that’s anoth­er sto­ry).

In addi­tion to the lengthy sto­ry­telling poet­ry, how­ev­er, there is also a short and sim­ple poem for which Longfel­low is cel­e­brat­ed, the inspi­ra­tional A Psalm of Life. First pub­lished in 1838 in the New York mag­a­zine The Knicker­bock­er, it is a sub­tle glo­ri­fi­ca­tion of life and its pos­si­bil­i­ties. As with Max Ehrmann’s Desider­a­ta and Rud­yard Kipling’s If, the poem is didac­tic in tone: an invo­ca­tion to mankind to fol­low the right path and think pos­i­tive­ly about life.

Its sub­ti­tle is What the Heart of the Young Man Said to the Psalmist, which cre­ates some con­text: it is a psalm in response to a psalm. It is an objec­tion to the idea, gleaned by the nar­ra­tor from lis­ten­ing to some bib­li­cal teach­ing, that this human life is not impor­tant; that we are made of dust and will even­tu­al­ly return to dust. No! he says — life is real, it’s seri­ous, and this is not a drill…your body may return to dust but you have a soul so don’t squan­der your time here by wor­ry­ing about death. As the sev­enth stan­za says, we can make our lives sub­lime, and, depart­ing, leave behind us foot­prints on the sands of time

I can’t do oth­er than endorse that thought! Now, read on…

Tell me not, in mourn­ful num­bers,
Life is but an emp­ty dream!
For the soul is dead that slum­bers,
And things are not what they seem.

Life is real! Life is earnest!
And the grave is not its goal;
Dust thou art, to dust returnest,
Was not spo­ken of the soul.

Not enjoy­ment, and not sor­row,
Is our des­tined end or way;
But to act, that each to-mor­row
Find us far­ther than to-day.

Art is long, and Time is fleet­ing,
And our hearts, though stout and brave,
Still, like muf­fled drums, are beat­ing
Funer­al march­es to the grave.

In the world’s broad field of bat­tle,
In the bivouac of Life,
Be not like dumb, dri­ven cat­tle!
Be a hero in the strife!

Trust no Future, howe’er pleas­ant!
Let the dead Past bury its dead!
Act,— act in the liv­ing Present!
Heart with­in, and God o’erhead!

Lives of great men all remind us
We can make our lives sub­lime,
And, depart­ing, leave behind us
Foot­prints on the sands of time;

Foot­prints, that per­haps anoth­er,
Sail­ing o’er life’s solemn main,
A for­lorn and ship­wrecked broth­er,
See­ing, shall take heart again
.

Let us, then, be up and doing,
With a heart for any fate;
Still achiev­ing, still pur­su­ing,
Learn to labor and to wait.

Hen­ry Wadsworth Longfel­low

Steely Dan’s Kid Charlemagne (1976)

Wal­ter Beck­er and Don­ald Fagen met in a cof­fee shop at New York State’s Bard Col­lege in 1967, dis­cov­ered that they had sim­i­lar tastes and opin­ions about music, and soon start­ed writ­ing songs togeth­er. After a stint ped­dling songs in Manhattan’s famous Brill Build­ing, the duo moved to Los Ange­les to try their luck on the west coast. Real­is­ing their songs were too com­plex for oth­er record­ing artists, they formed Steely Dan, and with pro­duc­er Gary Katz, would go on to pro­duce sev­en fab­u­lous albums of sophis­ti­cat­ed jazz rock between 1972 and 1980.

Their quest for per­fec­tion is leg­endary, and the duo’s shared aes­thet­ic meant that Steely Dan would soon enough became less “band” and more Beck­er and Fagen backed by a series of ses­sion musi­cians. They would audi­tion musi­cian after musi­cian and com­mis­sion take after take in a fas­tid­i­ous search for just the right sound, just the right style, to com­ple­ment their vision. But boy, did it pay off, as they got to har­ness the tal­ents of such leg­ends as gui­tarist Lar­ry Carl­ton, bass play­er Chuck Rainey, and drum­mer Bernard Pur­die, not to men­tion one Michael McDon­ald of Doo­bie Broth­ers fame on back­ing vocals.

Their well-craft­ed songs were large­ly crit­i­cal and com­mer­cial suc­cess­es and many would become radio sta­ples: Reel­in’ In The Years, Do It Again, Rik­ki Don’t Lose That Num­ber, Hait­ian Divorce, Peg. For me, one song in par­tic­u­lar sums up not only the genius of the music but Fagen’s won­der­ful sto­ry­telling abil­i­ty: Kid Charle­magne, the lead sin­gle from 1976’s The Roy­al Scam album. The song tells the sto­ry of the rise and down­fall of counter-cul­ture fig­ure­head Owsley Stan­ley (nick­named “Bear”), the Grate­ful Dead audio engi­neer and self-pro­claimed “King of Acid”. Bear’s clan­des­tine lab­o­ra­to­ry was respon­si­ble for sup­ply­ing the major­i­ty of the bur­geon­ing Cal­i­forn­ian LSD scene of the six­ties, and in him, Fagen found the per­fect char­ac­ter to weave a typ­i­cal­ly noir sto­ry around.

Take a look at the lyrics; they are full of deft touch­es. Fagen describes one of Bear’s par­tic­u­lar­ly suc­cess­ful LSD for­mu­la­tions: “Just by chance you crossed the dia­mond with the pearl”. And on Bear’s ded­i­ca­tion to his craft: “On the hill the stuff was laced with kerosene, but yours was kitchen clean”. And when things start to unrav­el (Bear was inevitably bust­ed of course), we can sense the para­noia: “Clean this mess up else we’ll all end up in jail, those test tubes and the scale, just get it all out of here”. And when the brown stuff is about to hit the fan, the cli­mac­tic ques­tion-response “Is there gas in the car? Yes, there’s gas in the car”. At this point I’m not only engaged with the sto­ry, I’m pos­i­tive­ly will­ing them to get the hell out of there!

Fagen’s lyrics over­lay a musi­cal pack­age that boasts a won­der­ful funk back­beat cour­tesy of Rainey and Pur­die, razor sharp rhythms and melodies from Beck­er and Fagen them­selves and from jazz pianists Paul Grif­fin and Don Grol­nick, and an astound­ing gui­tar solo (and out­ro) from Lar­ry Carl­ton. It is musi­cal alche­my of the high­est order.

Here’s the best live ver­sion I can find, in which the duo seem to have exer­cised the same rigour with this set of musi­cians as they did mak­ing the album!

While the music played you worked by can­dle­light
Those San Fran­cis­co nights
Were the best in town
Just by chance you crossed the dia­mond with the pearl
You turned it on the world
That’s when you turned the world around

Did you feel like Jesus
Did you real­ize
That you were a cham­pi­on in their eyes

On the hill the stuff was laced with kerosene
But yours was kitchen clean
Every­one stopped to stare at your tech­ni­col­or motor home
Every A‑Frame had your num­ber on the wall
You must have had it all
You’d go to LA on a dare
And you’d go it alone

Could you live for­ev­er
Could you see the day
Could you feel your whole world fall apart and fade away
Get along, get along Kid Charle­magne
Get along Kid Charle­magne

Now your patrons have all left you in the red
Your low rent friends are dead
This life can be very strange
All those day­glow freaks who used to paint the face
They’ve joined the human race
Some things will nev­er change

Son you were mis­tak­en
You are obso­lete
Look at all the white men on the street
Get along, get along Kid Charle­magne
Get along Kid Charle­magne

Clean this mess up else we’ll all end up in jail
Those test tubes and the scale
Just get them all out of here
Is there gas in the car
Yes, there’s gas in the car
I think the peo­ple down the hall
Know who you are

Care­ful what you car­ry
’Cause the man is wise
You are still an out­law in their eyes
Get along, get along Kid Charle­magne
Get along Kid Charle­magne

Wal­ter Beck­er and Don­ald Fagen

Artemisia Gentileschi’s Judith Slaying Holofernes (1620)

The first mem­ber of the artis­tic Gen­tileschi fam­i­ly that I became aware of was the Ital­ian Baroque artist, Orazio Gen­tileschi, whose Rest on the Flight to Egypt I came across a few years back in Vienna’s mag­nif­i­cent Kun­sthis­torisches Muse­um. How­ev­er, as acclaimed as Orazio was, it is his daugh­ter, Artemisia, whose name has come down to us today bear­ing the most crit­i­cal acclaim, and not just because she is cham­pi­oned as a woman who thrived in a man’s world, but also because she was lit­er­al­ly a bril­liant and accom­plished world-class artist.

Artemisia flour­ished in the first half of the 17th cen­tu­ry, work­ing in her father’s work­shop in Rome but also lat­er work­ing in Flo­rence, Venice, Naples and even in Lon­don where both she and her father had a spell work­ing as court painters for Charles I not long before the out­break of the Eng­lish Civ­il War. She spe­cial­ized in paint­ing nat­u­ral­is­tic pic­tures of strong and suf­fer­ing women from myth, alle­go­ry, and the Bible — Susan­na and the Elders, Judith Slay­ing Holofernes, Delilah, Salome, Bathshe­ba, Lucre­tia, Cleopa­tra, Jael, Mary Mag­da­lene…

Her works are con­vinc­ing depic­tions of the female fig­ure, any­where between nude and ful­ly clothed, and she clear­ly had a won­der­ful tal­ent for han­dling colour and build­ing depth. Her Judith Slay­ing Holofernes, paint­ed between 1614 and 1620, is a dra­mat­ic piece of art the­atre. It depicts the scene of Judith behead­ing Holofernes, an episode tak­en from the apoc­ryphal Book of Judith in the Old Tes­ta­ment, in which the Assyr­i­an gen­er­al Holofernes is assas­si­nat­ed by the Israelite hero­ine Judith. The paint­ing shows the moment when Judith, helped by her maid­ser­vant, beheads the gen­er­al after he has fall­en asleep drunk. Artemisia was just sev­en­teen when she paint­ed this, so pre­co­cious was her tal­ent.

That she was a woman paint­ing in the sev­en­teenth cen­tu­ry is wor­thy of note, of course (how much more art would exist today had tal­ent­ed female artists, the ones that were less con­nect­ed or gut­sy than Artemisia, been allowed to express them­selves?). But pure­ly on her work alone she was one of the most pro­gres­sive and expres­sive painters of her gen­er­a­tion, and that was a gen­er­a­tion that was already rich in artists inspired and flour­ish­ing in the foot­steps of Car­avag­gio. As it hap­pens, she is due to be com­mem­o­rat­ed this spring in a ret­ro­spec­tive exhi­bi­tion at London’s Nation­al Gallery. I’ll be there, hope­ful­ly!

Johann Sebastian Bach’s Christmas Oratorio (1734)

The Christ­mas Ora­to­rio (Wei­h­nacht­so­ra­to­ri­um) was one of three ora­to­rios writ­ten by Johann Sebas­t­ian Bach in 1734 and 1735 for major feasts, the oth­er two being the Ascen­sion Ora­to­rio and the East­er Ora­to­rio. The Christ­mas Ora­to­rio is by far the longest: in full, it is near­ly three hours long but it is made up of six parts, each can­ta­ta being intend­ed for per­for­mance on one of the major feast days of the Christ­mas peri­od.

The first can­ta­ta would be played on Christ­mas Day, and describes the Birth of Jesus; the sec­ond, for 26th Decem­ber, describ­ing the annun­ci­a­tion to the shep­herds; the third (27th Decem­ber), the ado­ra­tion of the shep­herds; the fourth (New Year’s Day), the cir­cum­ci­sion and nam­ing of Jesus; the fifth (the first Sun­day after New Year), the jour­ney of the Magi; and the final one (Epiphany, on 6th Jan­u­ary), the ado­ra­tion of the Magi.

Bach wrote his pieces in his role as musi­cal direc­tor for the city of Leipzig, where he was respon­si­ble for church music for the four church­es there, and head of the inter­na­tion­al­ly known boys’ choir, the “Thoman­er­chor”. The ora­to­rio was incor­po­rat­ed into the ser­vices of the two main church­es, Thomaskirche and Niko­laikirche, dur­ing the Christ­mas sea­son of 1734. That would have been some Christ­mas ser­vice to behold!

The part I’m high­light­ing here is the first aria from Part I, fea­tur­ing oboes d’amore, vio­lins and an alto voice, and known by its open­ing line, Bere­ite dich, Zion, mit zärtlichen Trieben (“Make your­self ready, Zion, with ten­der desires”). It is here per­formed exquis­ite­ly by this choir­boy and soloists from Munich’s Tölz­er Knaben­chor, and con­duct­ed by Niko­laus Harnon­court. A more haunt­ing piece of music fit for this sea­son would be hard to find. Grab a mince pie and lis­ten to this. Mer­ry Christ­mas!

Bere­ite dich, Zion, mit zärtlichen Trieben,
Den Schön­sten, den Lieb­sten bald bei dir zu sehn!
Deine Wan­gen
Müssen heut viel schön­er prangen,
Eile, den Bräutigam sehn­lichst zu lieben!

The “Clinton Baptiste” Scene From Peter Kay’s Phoenix Nights (2001)

Obser­va­tion­al com­e­dy takes for its source the minu­ti­ae of every­day life that peo­ple recog­nise with­out nec­es­sar­i­ly hav­ing con­scious­ly acknowl­edged or dis­cussed out loud. Essen­tial­ly, it begins with “Have you ever noticed…?” and fol­lows up with some amus­ing obser­va­tion that hope­ful­ly strikes a chord with the audi­ence. A large part of stand-up com­e­dy is based on this premise, of course. When you bring in some well-observed char­ac­ters, them­selves honed from years of obser­va­tion of var­i­ous arche­types, and put them into a well-devised sit­u­a­tion com­e­dy, you can add a whole new lev­el of humour; Peter Kay is a past mas­ter at this.

It’s his obser­va­tions of life grow­ing up in Bolton that informs Peter Kay’s com­e­dy. In Phoenix Nights, we see his com­e­dy oeu­vre at its finest, hav­ing filled it with idio­syn­crat­ic but true-to-life char­ac­ters and sce­nar­ios gleaned from his expe­ri­ences of north­ern work­ing men’s clubs (for fair­ness, it should be men­tioned that it was­n’t sole­ly Kay’s baby: Dave Spikey and Neil Fitz­mau­rice were co-cre­ators and writ­ers). The Phoenix Club is a fic­tion­al work­ing men’s club, home to the usu­al vari­ety of club themes: cabaret enter­tain­ment, bin­go nights, karaoke, raf­fles, fundrais­ers, and themed nights, with a stage bedecked with a tin­sel­ly back-drop and — all mod cons! — a smoke machine.

The scene I’m high­light­ing is the one star­ring “psy­chic medi­um”, Clin­ton Bap­tiste, and it strikes, I think, a seam of com­e­dy gold. Replete with the motifs of the end-of-the-pier enter­tain­er – the camp­ness, the mul­let, the flam­boy­ant suit, the local accent at odds with the assumed grav­i­tas of a true mys­tic – actor Alex Rowe’s char­ac­ter is a gift, and he por­trays it bril­liant­ly. The con­ceit is that Bap­tiste is a rub­bish medi­um, with no redeem­ing qual­i­ties, and none of the empa­thy that you would expect from a tru­ly spir­i­tu­al per­son.

Not only is he clum­si­ly obvi­ous with his cold-read­ing tech­niques (“is there a John in the audi­ence?”), but he also man­ages to cause offence and upset by deliv­er­ing the bluntest of mes­sages from “beyond the grave”. To one lady: “You’ve not been well have you? And it is ter­mi­nal, isn’t it…?” (which is evi­dent­ly news to her!). And to a man sit­ting with his wife: “Is there some­thing you want­ed to tell her? Get off your chest maybe?”. “What is it?”, we hear the wife demand­ing, as Clin­ton walks away.

Inci­den­tal­ly, Alex Rowe has gone on to devel­op the Clin­ton Bap­tiste char­ac­ter, out­side of the Phoenix Nights episode – check out the hilar­i­ous Clin­ton Baptiste’s Para­nor­mal Pod­cast. But for now, let’s watch his orig­i­nal scene, and enjoy Clin­ton “get­ting a word”…

Louis Jordan’s A Man’s Best Friend Is A Bed (1953)

My daugh­ters’ piano teacher, Chris, is a gift­ed pianist who plays in a band called Louis Louis Louis. They spe­cialise in jazz, swing, big band, boo­gie-woo­gie and jump blues, focus­ing (as their name sug­gests) on the three great Louis’s: Jor­dan, Arm­strong and Pri­ma. Sad­ly, the time con­straint of the piano les­son win­dow (along with the girls’ mor­ti­fi­ca­tion at any con­ver­sa­tion ini­ti­at­ed by me going beyond nor­mal pleas­antries) pre­cludes me from pro­claim­ing to Chris: “I love Louis Jor­dan!”. Yet it’s true: I dis­cov­ered the mar­vel­lous up-tem­po jump blues and rich vocal tones of Louis Jor­dan and his Tym­pa­ny Five many years ago, specif­i­cal­ly from this com­pi­la­tion album here called Out Of Print:


Jor­dan had start­ed his career in the big-band swing era of the 1930s, being a mem­ber of the influ­en­tial Savoy Ball­room orches­tra, led by drum­mer Chick Webb, in New York’s Harlem dis­trict. He spe­cialised in the alto sax, but also played tenor sax, bari­tone sax, piano and clar­inet. He was also a great song­writer, a con­sum­mate­ly good singer, and had a won­der­ful­ly com­ic and ebul­lient per­son­al­i­ty that soon made him stand out from the crowd. This was the same peri­od that a young Ella Fitzger­ald was com­ing to promi­nence and she and Jor­dan often sang duets on stage.

Jor­dan would soon have his own band, pared down to a sex­tet, and a res­i­den­cy at the Elks Ren­dezvous club, down the street from the Savoy on Lenox Avenue. Their style was a dynam­ic, up-tem­po, dance-ori­ent­ed hybrid of ear­li­er gen­res which became known as “jump blues” and was an instant hit with the audi­ences. His band, the Tym­pa­ny Five, start­ed record­ing music with Dec­ca records in Decem­ber 1938, and through­out the 1940s they released dozens of hit songs, includ­ing Sat­ur­day Night Fish Fry, the com­ic clas­sic There Ain’t Nobody Here But Us Chick­ens, and the mul­ti-mil­lion sell­er, Choo Choo Ch’Boogie.

From July 1946 to May 1947, Jor­dan had five con­sec­u­tive num­ber 1 songs, and held the top slot for 44 con­sec­u­tive weeks, an amaz­ing tes­ta­ment to his pop­u­lar­i­ty at the time. It’s true to say that his­to­ry has giv­en him a raw deal, since his name is not as wide­ly known as it should be, giv­en the above stats (out­side sophis­ti­cat­ed cir­cles such as our own, of course!).

I’ve select­ed a song (from many can­di­dates) that is typ­i­cal of Jordan’s wit and charm: 1953’s A Man’s Best Friend Is A Bed. As well as being a jump­ing tune, the song extols the com­forts of the bed, and on cold morn­ings like today, who can’t relate to that?

Lis­ten to Louis: 

I want a great big com­fort­able bed, so I can real­ly spread out, and all that
Take it from me Ed, A man’s best friend is a bed

I want a big fat pil­low that’s soft­er than a bil­lowy cloud, for my head
Take it from me Nat, the best head piece ain’t a hat

Yes, a friend will ditch you, a horse will pitch you
A car will give you lots of grief
A dog will bite you, your wife will fight you
But if you want some gen­uine relief

Just get a great big com­fort­able bed, where you can real­ly spread out, and all that
Take it from me Ted, a man’s best friend is a bed

When you’re in trou­ble, wor­ries dou­ble
And every­body’s talk­ing back
Just take your shoes off, you’ll shake the blues off
If you would just let go and hit the sack

In a nice cool com­fort­able bed where you can real­ly spread out, and all that
Take it from me Ted, a man’s best friend is a bed

Ask any sol­dier, marine or sailor
Or any­one who’s been with­out, what do they miss most,
What thought is fore­most? No Sir, you’re wrong
!

It’s just a great big com­fort­able bed, where you can real­ly spread out, and all that
Take it from me Ted, a man’s best friend is a bed

Yeah, if you dig me Jack, you’ll hit the sack
This ain’t no junk boy, hit that bunk
Take it from me Ted, a man’s best friend is a bed

Louis Jor­dan

Gustave Caillebotte’s The Floor Scrapers (1875)

Many lead­ing artists in mid-19th cen­tu­ry France liked to test their artis­tic skills by depict­ing farm work­ers and peas­ants at toil in the coun­try­side – Courbet’s The Stone Break­ers (1850) and Millet’s The Glean­ers (1857), for exam­ple.

As the cen­tu­ry wore on, some artists began to explore the con­cept of men and women at work in urban set­tings – Manet’s The Road-Menders in the Rue de Berne (1878) springs to mind, as does Women Iron­ing (1884) by Degas. Of this genre, a per­son­al favourite of mine comes from Gus­tave Caille­botte and is called The Floor Scrap­ers (Les Rabo­teurs de Par­quet).

It depicts three top­less men work­ing on hands and knees, scrap­ing away at a par­quet floor in a Parisian apart­ment (thought to be Caille­bot­te’s own stu­dio). The com­po­si­tion is doc­u­men­tary-style, focus­ing on the actions and tech­niques of the floor-scrap­ers. Day­light enters the room from a win­dow on the far wall and gloss­es the smooth floor­boards with a white sheen. There are sev­er­al floor-scrap­ing tools as well as an opened bot­tle of (pre­sum­ably cheap) wine. The diag­o­nal align­ment of the floor­boards is off­set by the rec­tan­gu­lar pan­els on the far wall and by the curlicue motif of the iron grill on the win­dow and the wood shav­ings that lit­ter the floor. It is a mas­ter­piece of real­ist paint­ing.

His piece was per­fect­ly in keep­ing with aca­d­e­m­ic tra­di­tions, in terms of its per­spec­tive and the mod­el­ling and posi­tion­ing of the nude tor­sos of the work­ers. How­ev­er, despite this, the paint­ing was reject­ed at the 1875 Salon because of its ‘vul­gar’ real­ism. There’s no account­ing for taste. So Caille­botte threw his lot in with the Impres­sion­ists and exhib­it­ed it at the Impres­sion­ist Exhi­bi­tion of 1876.

These days, The Floor Scrap­ers is held in the Musée d’Or­say, although when I vis­it­ed, a few years ago, I was dis­ap­point­ed to find it was not on dis­play – you can’t win ‘em all (and I’ll just have to vis­it again when next in Paris)!

T S Eliot’s Macavity The Mystery Cat (1939)

Thomas Stearns (T S) Eliot (1888–1965) was a giant lit­er­ary fig­ure: one of the major poets of the 20th cen­tu­ry, as well as essay­ist, pub­lish­er, play­wright, and lit­er­ary crit­ic. He was born in St Louis, Mis­souri into a promi­nent Boston Brah­min fam­i­ly, but moved to Eng­land at the age of 25 and set­tled and mar­ried here, becom­ing a British sub­ject in 1927.

With­in a year of arriv­ing in Britain, Eliot had pub­lished his first major poem, The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock (1915), which came to be regard­ed as a mas­ter­piece of the Mod­ernist move­ment, and he fol­lowed that up with some of the best-known poems in the Eng­lish lan­guage, includ­ing The Waste Land (1922), The Hol­low Men (1925), Ash Wednes­day (1930), and Four Quar­tets (1943).

Eliot also had his whim­si­cal side, how­ev­er, and in 1939 pub­lished Old Possum’s Book of Prac­ti­cal Cats. This was a series of light poems about cats and their traits which he’d writ­ten through­out the thir­ties in let­ters to his god­chil­dren (“Old Pos­sum” was fel­low poet Ezra Pound’s nick­name for him). The best-known poem from that col­lec­tion, Macav­i­ty the Mys­tery Cat, is the one that arrest­ed my atten­tion the moment I read it (or heard it recit­ed) when I was a lad (it may well have been the only poem from the Book of Prac­ti­cal Cats that I read or heard recit­ed, giv­en that it was the “stand out” that pri­ma­ry school teach­ers reg­u­lar­ly latched onto).

Eliot was a big fan of Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sher­lock Holmes sto­ries and the char­ac­ter of Macav­i­ty is a lit­er­ary allu­sion to Mori­ar­ty, the arch-vil­lain and mas­ter­mind of those sto­ries (Holmes dubs Mori­ar­ty the “Napoleon of crime”, which is how Macav­i­ty is described in the last line of the poem). I loved that repeat­ing final line: “Macavity’s not there!”. It con­jures up the trope of the mas­ter jew­el thief or gen­tle­man spy, always one step ahead of the Law, always out­wit­ting his pur­suers. You can imag­ine the non­cha­lance.

But of course in real­i­ty it’s a cat, so it’s the spilled milk, the feath­ers on the lawn, the crash of a dust­bin lid, the scratch on the sofa…and of course he’s nev­er there. The lit­tle dev­il’s scarpered!

Here’s a record­ing of the man him­self recit­ing the poem:

Macav­i­ty’s a Mys­tery Cat: he’s called the Hid­den Paw—
For he’s the mas­ter crim­i­nal who can defy the Law.
He’s the baf­fle­ment of Scot­land Yard, the Fly­ing Squad’s despair:
For when they reach the scene of crime—Macavity’s not there!

Macav­i­ty, Macav­i­ty, there’s no one like Macav­i­ty,
He’s bro­ken every human law, he breaks the law of grav­i­ty.
His pow­ers of lev­i­ta­tion would make a fakir stare,
And when you reach the scene of crime—Macavity’s not there!
You may seek him in the base­ment, you may look up in the air—
But I tell you once and once again, Macav­i­ty’s not there!

Macav­i­ty’s a gin­ger cat, he’s very tall and thin;
You would know him if you saw him, for his eyes are sunken in.
His brow is deeply lined with thought, his head is high­ly domed;
His coat is dusty from neglect, his whiskers are uncombed.
He sways his head from side to side, with move­ments like a snake;
And when you think he’s half asleep, he’s always wide awake.

Macav­i­ty, Macav­i­ty, there’s no one like Macav­i­ty,
For he’s a fiend in feline shape, a mon­ster of deprav­i­ty.
You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square—
But when a crime’s dis­cov­ered, then Macav­i­ty’s not there!

He’s out­ward­ly respectable. (They say he cheats at cards.)
And his foot­prints are not found in any file of Scot­land Yard’s
And when the larder’s loot­ed, or the jew­el-case is rifled,
Or when the milk is miss­ing, or anoth­er Peke’s been sti­fled,
Or the green­house glass is bro­ken, and the trel­lis past repair
Ay, there’s the won­der of the thing! Macav­i­ty’s not there!

And when the For­eign Office find a Treaty’s gone astray,
Or the Admi­ral­ty lose some plans and draw­ings by the way,
There may be a scrap of paper in the hall or on the stair—
But it’s use­less to investigate—Macavity’s not there!
And when the loss has been dis­closed, the Secret Ser­vice say:
It must have been Macavity!’—but he’s a mile away.
You’ll be sure to find him rest­ing, or a‑licking of his thumb;
Or engaged in doing com­pli­cat­ed long divi­sion sums.

Macav­i­ty, Macav­i­ty, there’s no one like Macav­i­ty,
There nev­er was a Cat of such deceit­ful­ness and suavi­ty.
He always has an ali­bi, and one or two to spare:
At what­ev­er time the deed took place: MACAVITY WASN’T THERE !
And they say that all the Cats whose wicked deeds are wide­ly known
(I might men­tion Mungo­jer­rie, I might men­tion Grid­dle­bone)
Are noth­ing more than agents for the Cat who all the time
Just con­trols their oper­a­tions: the Napoleon of Crime!

2nd June 1951: Amer­i­can-Eng­lish poet and play­wright, TS Eliot (1888 — 1965). He wrote amongst many oth­er things, ‘The Waste Land ’ and the plays, ‘The Cock­tail Par­ty’ and ‘Mur­der in the Cathe­dral’. Orig­i­nal Pub­li­ca­tion: Pic­ture Post — 5314 — Are Poets Real­ly Nec­es­sary? — pub. 1951 (Pho­to by George Douglas/Picture Post/Getty Images)

Katsushika Hokusai’s Ejiri In Suruga Province (c.1830)

The Edo peri­od in Japan was a 250 year peri­od of sta­bil­i­ty, last­ing between 1603 and 1868, when the coun­try was under the rule of the Toku­gawa shogu­nate. It was a rich time for the devel­op­ment of Japan­ese cul­ture and saw the devel­op­ment of Japan­ese cul­tur­al themes recog­nis­able today like kabu­ki the­atre, Geisha girls, sumo wrestling and ukiyo‑e wood­block print art.

Ukiyo‑e trans­lates as “pic­tures of the float­ing world” and referred to the hedo­nis­tic lifestyle preva­lent in the plea­sure dis­tricts of Edo (mod­ern-day Tokyo). Thus, we see a vari­ety of erot­ic themes in this art, but also plen­ty of land­scapes, flo­ra and fau­na, and scenes from his­to­ry and folk tales. A famous pro­po­nent of ukiyo‑e was Kat­sushi­ka Hoku­sai (1760–1849), best known for his wood­block print series Thir­ty-six Views of Mount Fuji which includes the inter­na­tion­al­ly icon­ic print, The Great Wave off Kana­gawa.

Hoku­sai cre­at­ed the Thir­ty-Six Views both as a response to a domes­tic trav­el boom and as part of a per­son­al obses­sion with Mount Fuji. The series depicts Mount Fuji from dif­fer­ent loca­tions and in var­i­ous sea­sons and weath­er con­di­tions. It was this series, and specif­i­cal­ly The Great Wave print, that secured Hokusai’s fame both in Japan and over­seas. They are won­der­ful­ly sim­ple yet evoca­tive pieces.

The series was pro­duced from around 1830 to 1832, when Hoku­sai was in his sev­en­ties and at the height of his career. As well as The Great Wave, you may also recog­nise Rain­storm Beneath the Sum­mit and Fine Wind, Clear Morn­ing. My per­son­al favourite, how­ev­er, is Ejiri in Suru­ga Province: a sud­den gust of wind takes some trav­ellers by sur­prise, blow­ing away the hat of a man who tries in vain to catch it. Bits of paper whirl away from a woman’s back­pack and scat­ter into the air. The woman’s wind-tossed cloth cov­ers her face, and the tall tree in the fore­ground los­es its leaves. Oth­er trav­ellers face the wind, crouch­ing low to avoid it and cling­ing to their hats. Fuji, mean­while, stands white and unshak­en, affect­ed nei­ther by the wind nor the human dra­ma.

Ejiri in Suru­ga Province

Commentaries on excellence in art, music, film, and literature